Ahhhhhhh, A Holiday Weekend And Mom Sleeps In

Shah, as if.

I’ve always had this naive little fantasy that if I let my kids stay up late, they’ll sleep in the next day. Nope, they still wake up at 7, but they also wake up grouchy and annoying.

I was in such a deep sleep this morning. Oh, so, cozy, prolly even dreaming before my nightmare began. The nightmare of the morning process.

Garren enters room: Mom can you change the channel? It’s Yo Gabba Gabba and I want to watch Spongebob

Madeleine: No! I want to watch Yo Gabba Gabba

Ok, Garren since Yo Gabba Gabba was already on we have to finish it and then you can watch Spongebob.

I hate Yo Gabba Gabba!

Too damn bad. It’s already on, so deal.

*sweet, I still got to stay in bed to solve that one

Graham enters room: Hey mom!


Graham: Remember that tooth I lost the other day? Well look, this tooth is loose now too!

Oh, gee, wow Graham that’s great. Now let me sleep.

*closes eyes to attempt sleep

Madeleine enters room: Mom, you know that cartoon we were just watching? There was girl in there named Madison.

Oh wow, how cool. That’s very similar to Madeleine isn’t it? Now go away so I can sleep.

Gavin enters room: Gaykin…….mom (Gavin doesn’t quite get that speed is the key to putting a sentence together, he still has a pause between each word.  translation: Can I have some bacon mom?)

Grrrrrrrrrrrr! There’s no weasling out of this one, I have to get up

Hears Garren at the dining room table: Oh Garren’s hungry for a bowl of cereal. His tummy is growling. (I forgot to mention Garren only speaks in the 3rd person)

I get up, notice Gavin has a diaper that needs to be changed. (ok I lied, Madeleine told me it needed to be changed) I change it, make the gaykin and a bowl of cereal and I talk to no one because I don’t want to fully wake myself up. I deal the goods out and hop back into bed.

Graham enters room: Mom can I have a bowl of cereal?

Sure Graham, go ahead, make one.

I’m thinking muther fucker! Why are you asking me if  you can have a bowl of cereal? Just make it and eat the damn thing.

Madeleine enters room: Mom can I have a pancake with marshmellows cut up on top. (she’s always trying to think of different toppings for her pancakes)

At this point I don’t care, I just want to be left alone. If she had asked for the entire bag of marshemellows I prolly would have let her. I’m so glad she didn’t.

Garren enters room: Mom, can I play your computer?

Ok, I give up. I quit.  Final Score:  Kids – 4  Mom- 0

Madeleine enters room: Mom can I just have a marshmellow and no pancake?

Madeleine, why don’t you guys bug your dad for anything in the morning? Seriously why?

Because he would say no.

I get it now. I’ve been labeled. I’m the pushover.


(and before any of you get started with your, well back in the day, I had to milk the cow myself to get milk for my cereal, I just want to tell you that you can bugger off)



  1. First, I had to wake the cows up. . .

    There are benefits to being an empty nester and you just described one of the things about children I don’t miss.

  2. First, I had to wake the cows up. . .

    hahaha, I knew you were going to do that. :)

  3. I’ve been told (it’s too far back for me to remember) that when my parents went to bed around 2, they’d put a bowl of cereal and a small cup of milk and a spoon in one of the low cabinets in the kitchen. So when I got up at 5, I could make my own breakfast.

    This was apparently before I was old enough to open the fridge on my own, so I’m guessing that I was 3 or 4 years old at the time.

    Maybe you could get a mini-fridge for the kids? Pancakes will keep for a few days if they’re refrigerated.

  4. Oh you know what Alice?!?!?! I’d totally forgotten I used to do something similar to that for Graham when he was a lonely only.

    I am sooo gonna try that tomorrow! They can open fridge (unfortunately) so I’ll just put it in a cup because they can’t lift the milk container. I’m stunned it hasn’t dawned on me to do this for the other ones. I love you!


  5. Yer all sissies.

    I had to help a cow throw the calf, and then wait for the little bugger to grow up before I could have milk.

  6. Master Chief had TO WALK IN THE SNOW BAREFOOT to wake the cows to get the milk.

    I didn’t. Mom was close with the milkman.


    . Where’s my bacon?

  7. “close”. . . That’s an interesting euphemism!

  8. all was well, Bacon was had!

  9. PJM,
    My DOGs! will not let me sleep later than 7am. If I crack an eye open after 6:45, they both pounce! In the 3 nanoseconds after I open my eyes I see them laying on the dog bed next to my bed, head on both paws staring at me, then they both are licking my face. You cannot sleep thru that. So on the weekends I take them for a walk, and then go back to sleep.

  10. I feel your pain. My four year old daughter gets up, tries to be quiet, but then proceeds to sing at the top of her little lungs.

    And then my eight year old son gets into it, LOUDLY whispering that they have to be quiet, that mom and dad are sleeping.

    It never ends.

  11. And that is precisely why I have a lock on the bedroom door…and I’m not afreaid to use it.

  12. And then my eight year old son gets into it, LOUDLY whispering that they have to be quiet, that mom and dad are sleeping.

    hahahaha, I hate that! They scream BE QUIET THEY’RE TRYING TO SLEEP!

    And that is precisely why I have a lock on the bedroom door…and I’m not afreaid to use it.

    I envy you BiW. If I didn’t have a two year old my door would most definitely be locked.

  13. Holy crap. This is MY weekend morning. EVERY weekend. This morning I really felt like a schmo though. MP kept coming in and coming in and coming in, and I kept replying without opening my eyes. When I got up a short while later, there was a little note next to my pillow that said “I U Mommy.”

    Ugh. Schmo.

  14. Oh mommypie, she’s gooooood. She laid that guilt on THICK!

  15. your kids sound like my teens!

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