How To Traumatize A Four Year Old

I’m going to hell. Do Not Pass Go. Do Not Collect $200. That’s all there is to it, I am going straight to hell.  Never, ever, ever, ever, ever watch a youtube video around your kids w/out having viewed it first. Did I mention, never ever? I know this. I can’t believe I did it anyways, it just looked so harmless. We were watching, “Charlie the Unicorn” which they love, and the bad video we watched was from the same guy.

I’m the type of mom who doesn’t even watch the evening news if my children are around. When I was a kid, it was the world news at 6 o’clock anchored by Dan Rather followed by the local news at 6:30. Who would have thought watching the news would be so terrifying?  I remember laying in my bed at night unable to sleep as my imagination took over and the news of the day haunted me. I was certain I was going to be kidnapped (yep, the Adam Walsh story did that to me), or that an airplane was going to crash into my house and wipe out my entire neighborhood.  Course back then I prolly didn’t care about the neighbors, I was just worried about my own demise. Screw the neighbors.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the years of therapy Garren is going to require now because we watched this stupid video. Granted I turned it off when I realized what was going on, but it was too late. The damage had been done. I’ve tried to convince him that……….well, I’ll just let you watch the video. Just remember, he’s at the age where he’s unable to distinguish between a cartoon and real people. I’m still going to marry Speed Racer.