Michael Phelps is 6’4″ What If His Mother Had Chosen Gymnastics For Him Instead?

Well it’s a darn good thing she didn’t because he won his 6th gold medal tonight. 11 total.

All I can say is the guy’s insane.

He’s got one sweet body, but the dude suffers from no assitol.


  1. I think that having a lumpy bum would screw with his aerodynamics.
    The kid is a freak, but a freak that’s fun to watch. Mmmmm, Michael Phelps’ abs.

  2. OMG. I am laughing out loud over here!

    They just showed how perfect his body is for swimming… even though his legs are too short for his torso…. and even though he has no ass. He’s a speedboat blessed freak of nature. HOORAY for the USA!

  3. Can you imagine having to feed that lean, mean, no body fat, energy machine his 12,000 calories a day? That is like having to feed six more kids.

    My hoosband used to be a long distance runner in college. Mmmm…lean ripped muscles.

  4. hahaha! You’re insane.. I mean that in a “you rule, but you’re also a bit nuts” kinda way.

  5. He really is completely out of this world. Once he’s done with the whole “World Domination” thing, he really needs to put on just a few more pounds…maybe he can fix his ass problem in the process.

  6. When he’s done winning medals he can start a new career – plumbing.

  7. talea- it’s been a blast watching him. The dude’s like a full body length ahead of everyone.

    T- his legs are too short for his torso? Dang! Another thing I’ll focus on. I feel like Seinfeld.

    porknbean- I eat like him now, cept I don’t do all that swimming.

    tesco- you and abbadon made me think of this song today

    shannon- he rocks. The part that made it sweet was the fact that another team, the French said they were here to crush them or something like that. See where trash talking gets ya? booyah

    abbadon- maybe he can come work for you? He could be one of your boy toys. ;)

  8. I remember, back in the day, when I was doing hard, physical labor. . . I was 6’3″, had a 29″ waist, weighed 170 and ate like there was no tomorrow. *sigh*

  9. I could probably eat all I wanted and not gain weight when I was around the age of 10. Course I’m not sure because I was never allowed to eat all I want.

  10. Course I’m not sure because I was never allowed to eat all I want.

    Like that ever stopped you…let’s stroll down memory lane


  11. lol @ Kare-Kare

  12. Swimmer? Gymnast? He’s a plumber with that crack.

  13. oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, kare-kare LMAO! You’re evil

    dadshouse, I will help him with his plumbing. did I say that outloud?

  14. Busted!

    How’s the academy, Kare-kare?

  15. I might have been a little wrong MCPO. she doesn’t start till later. that was just her costume pickup day

  16. How’s the academy, Kare-kare?

    It’s getting close! I am meeting with all the other cadets to do a motivational run/picnic before our actual start date…exactly 2 weeks away. The yelling can’t be any worse than my husband’s ex-wife, right?

  17. Well, I wouldn’t know. My Boot Camp experience was fairly portrayed in “Full Metal Jacket” minus the last scene in the head.

  18. so they hit you with pillowcases full of soap? that’s just awful!

  19. PJ – Not me. But, it happened to a guy in our company who was gigged on 2 consecutive personnel inspections and cost us a regimental flag.

  20. Navy boot camp tough…. heh. Where’d you go? Great Lakes? Orlando? San Diego? I used to visit Great Lakes pretty often. Looked pretty nice to me. And I will freely admit that the Marines boot camp is tougher than the Army’s.

  21. My oldest brother came home with bruised lips from his Marine Corps bootcamp. Apparenlty his drill sergeant or whatever they’re called decided he wanted to take the smirk off my brother’s face so he took his lips and twisted them. Over 20 years later, he’s still smirking. And of course my other brother is smiling in his group graduation photo instead of looking stern like everyone else.

  22. Over 20 years later, he’s still smirking

    I think that is some family curse of ours. Dad had the same problem in the academy and you know I will too….I’m screwed. Everyone will have to do extra push ups because of my smirk.

  23. I just thought of a great money making idea. I’m going to stand outside your training building and sell pillow cases full of soap.

  24. PJM – I recommend “Ivory”. It’s really dense and packs a wallop.

    Xbrad – I went to Great Mistakes. It was during Vietnam. Considerably tougher than it is today. Thanks for playing.

  25. I just thought of a great money making idea. I’m going to stand outside your training building and sell pillow cases full of soap.

    Hahahhahahahahha! Wench.

    As for you MCPO…quiet down.

  26. Meanwhile, the Olympic judges are looking into allegations about a small motor that fits where his ass used to be……

  27. Your blog is really really good. I really appriciate your blog. Thanks for your effort. Really good pictures. Love to watch them.

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